How to wear Bloomers!

Harem pants are everywhere and the unfortunate thing is that I've actually seen people wearing them! Personally I can't really imagine a sheikh somewhere having a room full of girls all wearing pants that look like a saggy nappy and make you walk like a duck - not a sexy look unless you're into some pretty weird stuff.
Fear not, there are alternatives and one of the best is Bloomers. Good ol Victorian undies, but of course brought right up to date and out from under skirts.

1) The first thing is to choose the correct length. There are two main lengths that you can't go wrong with;  3/4 and full length. If you are small, knee length (or just slightly above the knee) looks really cute instead of 3/4, If you are tall, avoid knee length at all costs, you will look like your bloomers shrunk in the wash. If you are older than four, do not ever even think about shorts or mid-thigh length; it's not cheeky, it's on a par with wearing pink cropped t-shirts and glitter eyeshadow into your 50's.

2) Shooooes...For 3/4 length bloomers, the higher the better, bring out the platforms, stillettos, sky high wedges, take your pick but make sure that they are for day, not too delicate and contain no trace of vintage. This is the first step to bringing bloomers out of the 19th centuary.  Think John Galliano, Givenchy's Holly-strap sandals, or Burberry Prorsum fantastic range in rubber, leather and wood. For night you can go for something prettier and lighter - maybe some mirrored Jimmy Choo stillettos. Only if you are planning on wearing full length can you think of wearing a flat shoe, but no converse, docs or ballet style pumps. rather go for something like a multi-strapped sandal with really skinny strapping, or for evening, something with a bit of sparkle. Also remember that with full length, the cuffs of your bloomers must cover your foot.

3) Fit:  When looking for bloomers, make sure that they are not gathered at the waist. They should have a slim fit over the hips and bum and flare into the leg,  the cuff should be long to even out the proportions. They should not look like a sheet that someone's grandmother has put 10m of elastic into. When they are well cut, bloomers will accentuate your waist, lengthen your legs and slim (believe it or not) your thighs. They also camoflauge any lumpy bits around your legs. They must never ever ever have a dropped crotch. Actually nothing in this world should ever have a dropped crotch.


4) Fabric and detailing:  Before we go any further, resist the urge for lace!
The nicest fabrics for bloomers are crisp and infinitely creaseable: cotton chinz, voiles, Egyptian cotton or fine linen for day. Of course they must be lined so as to keep their shape, They should be very slightly sheer, just enough that they have a slight glow. These fabrics will ensure that the bloomers aren't too volumous, they give the pants a great drape, are cool and wear beautifully. Yes, or course they crease, but that is actually part of the idea - they look even better when they are a bit crumpled. For evening a chiffon, georgette or silk chameuse is decadent and elegant. And no, there is to be no lace and none of that dreadful broderie anglaise anywhere on the bloomers, not even a little bit.

5) Colour: I love bright colour, but there is something about bloomers that discourages too much colour. They just seem to look better in neutrals. Black and white are classic. If white, you need to be even more careful not too let them look like antiques. Pale golds and silvers look elegant for evening. Cottons look great when they have been dip-dyed from a neutral down to a bright dirty pink, red, indigo or mint at the cuffs, but that flash of colour is all you can really get away with.

6) Wear bloomers with: since bloomers are volumous, keep your top slim fitting. They look great with a tailored shirt and a waistcoat, or if you really want to bring in lace, you can do it with your top, BUT, it must be bold and clean in both colour and design. No little frillies and excess fripperies. NO white or cream. Warp tops work well as they are just that much more dressy than a t-shirt. If your top is loose fitting or has a lot of detail at neckline, tuck it in and/or wear a belt to give a bit of a differenciation.

7) Corsets & Bloomers: One word - DON'T. Unless you are doing a Victorian photoshoot or want to walk down the street looking like an undressed time-traveller, don't even think it. If you want to show off your waist, wear a broad leather belt.

8) Jewelry - big, bold chunky. No dainty draped necklaces or marquesite and pearl rings. Jewelry is like shoes in this case - think entirely modern statement pieces.

A last word, the trick to carrying off bloomers is to be polished. I have always been someone who is slightly scruffy and undone, but it just doesn't work in this case - probably because that will always bring it back to the bedroom. They are one of those intimidating garments with so many preconceptions behind them that most people are scared off just by the idea, but once you've figured out how to make them work for you, they are flattering, interesting and fresh.